resurrection
October 26, 2006
catesbool
it was the perfect way to end a listless day…
i am proud of myself. i churned out two and three fourths of trashy chapters in one week. hah! my muse has returned, inspiration has struck and i may just be able to go home with not just a certificate of appreciation, err participation. thanks to polin and her painful reminder of that.
i started working wednesday last week on the first chapter of my primary data. i skipped paris, amidst questions and expectations from friends. i decided, well, what the hell, i might as well force myself to sit down and try to enjoy the perfect weather from the confines of the room just gazing out into the sea and the thousand and one moods of the blue skies of den haag. and that, my friend, is exactly just what i did. i’ve written two chapters in four days, sent them to my supervisor last monday and started writing on the third chapter of my primary data. and voila! i hit saturation point.
when you read through 60 pages of your own transcriptions at least five times in a day just trying to figure out which part should go where in your paper, your mind just suddenly pops and you just have to stop.
today, after typing my 3,256th word and i am just 3/4 of my chapter on the stories of the workers, my mind just went completely blank. and i said to myself, "oh, wow! i can’t do this anymore today. i am not going to beat lee’s deadline at 4:30 today and try to send another chapter of junk to him when he is not even going to be able to finish reading the 7,000 words i just sent him last monday."
well, i have to admit, it was a clever idea right now. you see, my supervisor is leaving on the first week of november and the next time i’ll be seeing him will be right after due date of the final research paper. that is why i forced myself to write in one week so that he can see that, well, i do make sense sometimes even though my sense is senseless. he should give me an A for effort. heheheh!
well, truth is, he wanted to see all the re-drafts of the chapters of all the students he is supervising before he leaves. so, being the sucker that i am, i junked paris and then later learned from the iss photo album and from my mails that my macedonia colleagues just went off to budapest and paris while i got to stay behind. heheheheh! i’m a s*.**er!
well anyway, i sent lee a message this afternoon and told him, "lee, my mind just went blank and i cannot give you all my chapters today so you will just have to do with what i have." five minutes later, i got a reply from lee telling me, "okay, send whatever you have." so i send him my 3/4 of a chapter and another five minutes later, i get another message from him asking, "am i supposed to comment on this next week on top of the two chapters you already sent me earlier in the week??? just asking to be precise and accurate." i swear i was seeing his eyes bulging at me when he was typing that message and i was laughing realllly hard with the message. so i sent in a reply and sweetly said, "yes, please. i would really appreciate hearing your comments on the 2 and 3/4 of my chapters. i promise to give you the completed version of that 3/4 of a chapter first thing on monday morning before i meet with you. thanks!" hahahah! that should give him something to bite on.
so, off my head went and i went to bed, trying to sleep. ten minutes later, i just discovered that my head is so full of primary data that sleep was impossible. and it was just a quarter to three in the afternoon. i had to figure out what to do for the rest of my afternoon, with my mind in such a clueless state on how to proceed further with my chapter.
nail tapping… nail tapping… sneeze! and hold it right there. nancy. i sent a message to nancy and asked her if she wanted to have a drink or to take a walk. she told me to come by at 4 so i told her, "okay, just let me shower coz i still stink." at 4:30 p.m., i was pounding at her door and she was spoiling me with fresh oranges and we were preparing to go to centrum for a walk.
fifteen minutes later, i am holding a medium vanilla ice cream in my hand and she was enjoying a cone of patat and we were walking back to iss to crash howard nicholas’ party at the iss bar. we get our free drinks, try to talk to some people and mingle. i go up, check my pigeon hole and there it was, tutay’s graduation gift: a very dainty set of pearl necklaces and i had this very big grin on my ears. it was absolutely perfect! and then i said to myself, "okay, this should be a good sign. i may be able to graduate after all." hehehehe!
i go down and i signal to nancy that it is time to leave and we go back to dorus to wait for dani and angela coz we’re going to see a movie in the filmhaus. the movie was supposed to start at 7 pm and we hurried on, walking so briskly on the way to centrum, trying to catch the tram so we can make it in time for the film.
unfortunately, the filmhaus cancelled the movie at the last minute and we got refunds for our ticket. we decide to go to pathe to check out what is showing and as we made our way back through centrum, we see the underwears in hunkemoller and nancy was saying, "shopping day!"
next thing i knew, we were inside the shop, looking at exquisite bras and panties and we were trying them on. couldn’t find anything in my size and so did nancy. so we go to H&M and voila! i found my soulmate! it was in exquisite white lace and i thought to myself, "i deserve this!" so bye bye money and hello shopping for me. it was a liberating experience! i finally made it out of the room in seinpost, i had ice cream, i shopped for an underwear and how much more can i pamper myself? happiness comes in such simple treats. sigh!
we go home, happy with our purchases and then we decide to have coffee in dani’s place and see three episodes of the last season of sex & the city. nancy made hot chocolates and angela made fresh croissants and we were all sitting contentedly in front of dani’s laptop.
at 11 p.m., i go home and check my forgotten mails and what do i see? the perfect ending to my perfect day. i see polin’s comment on my blog and i know that God is giving me signposts. i’m going to be okay after a day and i will be hard at work in front of my laptop again, chunking off loads of junks for my supervisor to read.
ooopppssss!!!! i forgot i had hot tea waiting for me…. and andreas indira asked me how i am and i remember the two bunsoys in kuya’s and my life just last spring and during the early summer.
tea and sympathy, andreas & irish! kuya just went downstairs an hour ago to ask for mint tea. me? heck! i’m gonna be sitting down contentedly tonight, enjoy myself for a while without any worry and tomorrow, my perspective will come again.
Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone.
- pablo picasso
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